Working Mom No Longer

I have recently joined the ranks of the unemployed. This is a new experience for me. I have been continuously employed since high school when I got my first part-time job. In college, while the students I went to school with took breaks from work to focus on school, I took breaks from school to focus on work and bolstering my savings account so I could pay for a few more quarters.

After college I spent two years as every employers dream: fresh out of college; willing to work for a pittance; no other responsibilities; eager to throw myself into my work. I did all that my job called for and more. I worked weekends. I volunteered for out-of-town seminars and training. If there was an opportunity to cast my pearls before the decision makers, I was there at the front of the line, freshly-ironed pantsuit gleaming. Then I committed the most selfish and inconsiderate act any woman ever can to betray her employer: I got pregnant.

I maintained my 50-60 hour-per-week devotion to work throughout my pregnancy (for the most part). My water broke one morning in December while I was getting ready for work; twenty-two hours later I was mom to a 6lb 4oz tiny baby girl! She didn't have to say anything, I knew immediately she would not tolerate my break-neck schedule.

Fast forward to the end of my maternity leave: I found myself relocating to Charlotte, NC. My current company had no openings there, and I could've spent years waiting on a transfer, so I resigned and began searching for a new job. I took a sales position with a small, up-start staffing company.

The problem with small companies is that they don't have the resources to support and maintain employees who need time off for whatever reason: their own sickness, sickness of a family member. Just before I got this job, Lacey was diagnosed with hip dysplasia and had to see a pediatric orthopedist once a week. In addition to the weekly specialist visits were ultrasounds on her hips and the usual well-baby visits with her pediatrician. Throw in a couple of ear infections, and I over-drew the already meager sick day allowance in just a few months.

It finally happened last week. I was "let go" due to excessive absences. I've never been fired from a job (let's call it what it is, rather than "let go"). I can't explain the feeling of embarrassment and failure, but also of righteousness. I could never under any circumstances short-change my daughter's health or well-being. If I had it to do over again, knowing the eventual outcome, I would take every bit of the time off again.

This whole experience leads me to ask, "How does a mother successfully maintain a career"? Things would be easier if I was still with my previous employer, as I had nearly 6 years with them, but beginning a new job? FMLA coverage doesn’t take effect until you've been with an employer for 12 months (3 more months at my last job and it would've been illegal for them to fire me due to a family member's illness). If a woman is already in a stable career, she is protected. But what about a mother entering or returning to the workforce? What incentives are there for a small business to hire or retain working moms (I'm not blind to the financial burdens placed on the businesses)?

I don't know if the answer lies in bolstering the laws that protect parents in the workforce or if the burden should lie with private companies and their policies. I don't have any statistics to back this up, but I would imagine the cost of high employee turnover is greater than the cost to retain an employee through a family illness.

As I search for a new job with any luck I'll come across the solution. I'm afraid right now though, that my generation won't see any solutions. Hopefully my daughter will find it easier to play the role of both mother and wage-earner.